The John Tesh Blog

Addicted to Stress

In today's excerpt from my new book Intelligence For Your Life: Powerful Lessons For Personal Growth I share my insights on a very popular subject to which I am no stranger-STRESS! At a time in my life when I could barely stay on top of my hectic schedule, I realized how addicted to stress I was. I also learned what I could do to make necessary changes to my lifestyle.

A friend of mine once said, “It’s much easier to stay out of temptation than it is to get out.” It’s the same with stress. Stay away. Think—really think—to yourself, Is this stress really worth it? Some stress is necessary and good, of course.

Any way you cut it, there is stress involved in being a parent. The rewards of raising healthy, happy kids are well worth a little stress; that’s a trade-off we’re willing to make. But not everything that stresses you out is worth the cost. And some good and worthwhile things—even parenting—cause more stress than they have to.

It seems strange to say it, but stress in our society has become a full-blown addiction. We thrive on it. We use caffeine to enhance it, and we speak of it with reverence and pride like it’s some sort of badge of accomplishment. Before I met my wife, I was hosting two television shows (Entertainment Tonight, and the NBC show One on One), and each year I was releasing two albums and a PBS special, plus performing forty-five live concerts in forty-eight days—for five straight years! I worked seven days a week, slept five hours a night, and no doubt took at least five years off my life.

On any given day I was likely to lose the feeling in one or both of my arms, scream at my friends, and medicate myself with alcohol or sleeping pills at night—all because of stress. I would do interviews on morning radio shows, and the hosts would ask, “How do you do it”? I would extol the virtues of hard work—yada yada yada.

The pitiful thing was that a lot of what I was doing was garbage. I didn’t really need to do another TV show. Nobody got saved as a result of watching One on One with John Tesh. One album a year would have been fine. I could have played those forty-five concerts over a two-year period. I didn’t win any awards for getting them done in four months.

The truth is that I was addicted to stress. When I didn’t feel it coursing through my veins, I felt unfulfilled, worthless, benign. Stress was a kind of self-medication, just as surely as the alcohol and the sleeping pills.

I’ve got dozens—probably hundreds of tips for relieving stress. But they aren’t going to do you any good until you ask yourself a couple of hard questions. Do I even want to have less stress in my life? I used to say I wanted a less stressful life, but I still made choices every day that ramped up the stress . . . because managing an insane amount of stress made me feel alive, made me feel I was accomplishing something.

If I was honest with myself, I would have had to admit that no, I didn’t really want less stress in my life; at least I didn’t want it enough to change my lifestyle or my choices. I wasn’t ready to de-stress until after I had experienced a much deeper and all-encompassing change of heart.

You can find many more tips on relieving stress in my upcoming book Intelligence For Your Life: Powerful Lessons for Personal Growth to be released in March 2008. You can pre-order your copy at half price plus receive a free concert DVD by just clicking here.

John

Email John: johnsblog@teshmedia.com

Are Married People Happier Than Unmarried People?

Before you tie or untie the knot, you’ll need to untangle this question:  Are married couples better off than single people?

To discover the answer, several areas of daily living need to be examined.

Finances
Forbes magazine claims marriage places a tight squeeze on your finances. In the first year of marriage, newlyweds are scouting for a bigger home, purchasing nicer cars or taking on more expenses like insurance and home improvement.

What are financial advantages to married life?  In a nutshell, a marriage involves two people contributing money. Not just one.

With more available cash, a lesser percentage (9.3%) of the couple’s monthly income is slated for rent.  The single person earmarks at least 25% of his monthly nut for rent!

Married people pay less for food, cable television and the telephone bill. Why?  There are more finances to work with. A couple who files their 1040 jointly gets relief on both federal and Social Security taxes.  However, once the couple has children, their monthly expenses skyrocket.

On the flip side, single people save more money since they’re not shelling out a big chunk of their income on living expenses.

In the end, married people fare better because two heads and two incomes are better than one. 

Social Life

From two national studies done at Penn State University, married people today spend 40% less time with one another than they did twenty years ago.

Husbands and wives are developing their own networks of friends, joining different community organizations, pursuing separate hobbies and taking separate vacations.

Regarding marital happiness, socialite couples run neck and neck with active single people.

Physical Health

If you’re the kind of person who makes excessive demands, is too critical or continually agitates your partner, you may be making your mate sick.

In contrast, experts from the American Psychological Association state that possessing good communication skills, exhibiting dependability and understanding your mate can boost your partner’s health.   

On that same note, UCLA and UC Davis researchers report women in happy marriages recover more quickly from workday stress than women in unhappy relationships. This is due to the presence of the stress hormone cortisol according to The Sacramento Bee. When cortisol levels are high, women in happy marriages rebound quicker from a busy, stressful workday.

Who wins on this indicator?  Since singles lack someone living with them wearing on their health or helping them with their stress levels, I call it a tie.

Emotional Wellbeing

Studies from the American Psychological Association's (APA) Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, demonstrate most people are no more satisfied with life after marriage than they were prior to marriage.

A chronically unhappy person is not going to change their unhappiness after marriage. Watch out for the mate who demands, it’s your responsibility to keep them happy.

Marriage or divorce does not have the same implications for all individuals. A person satisfied with life probably has a rich social network and has less to gain from the companionship of marriage. On the other hand, the person who is lonely and, therefore, somewhat dissatisfied, can gain much by marrying.

No winner on this contest.  A single person can be happy without a mate and a married person can be unhappy even with a life partner.

Researchers will admit the increase in happiness of married people is very small -- approximately one tenth of one point on an 11-point scale.

The best advice is that happiness-for single or married people-is a decision you make on how you want to approach what life has handed to you.

John

Email John: johnsblog@teshmedia.com

You can still get my new hardcover book Intelligence For Your Life: Powerful Lessons for Personal Growth? You can pre-order it at half price and you'll receive a free concert DVD by just clicking here.

Crush Your Bad Habits

Aren't you tired of wrestling with the same old habits with no relief in sight?  I am.  Since it takes twenty-one days to break a habit, we've got no time to waste. 

Today's excerpt from my upcoming hardcover book, Intelligence For Your Life: Powerful Lessons for Personal Growth, will give you the tools to get you started on crushing your bad habits today. Most of the studies I have reported on the radio show recommend not just quitting “cold turkey” when it comes to your bad habit. It helps tremendously, if you are able to substitute another action for the offending behavior. For example,

My problem:

I have had the terrible habit of checking my e-mails repeatedly while hosting the radio show. When we go to commercial, immediately I check my e-mail. Maybe I’ll get something from my bank about a pension plan. Maybe it’s yet another “exclusive offer” for some product or service I don’t need. Or maybe it actually is something important. That’s not the point. The point is that in two seconds, I’m completely derailed from the task at hand. While I’m doing the show, my heart and mind are supposed to be devoted to the next bit of relationship intelligence or the next health tip.

My solution:

I’ve replaced my e-mail checks with ten pushups. I’m not kidding. It has worked wonders. It’s simple: When the urge strikes to check e-mail, I hit the floor. Believe me, I’m not a big fan of pushups; that’s part of the reason my habit-breaking plan has worked for me. I’m twenty-one days into my plan, and my attention is razor sharp. By the way, I do check my e-mail later when it’s appropriate and it doesn’t distract my attention away from the major task at hand.

I also recommend rewarding yourself for breaking a habit. Let’s say you’re giving up your soda habit, which is basically just empty calories and sugar. If you’ve gone five days without a soda, treat yourself to dinner at your favorite restaurant. I haven’t had my daily glass of wine for nineteen days as of this writing. (I felt I was setting a bad example for my kids.) I just treated myself to a half pint of Coldstone’s coffee ice cream to celebrate. Get it? Replace the bad behavior, reward yourself with milestone treats, and don’t forget the twenty-one day rule.

Want some more tips on how to crush your bad habits?  You'll find much more in my book Intelligence For Your Life: Powerful Lessons for Personal Growth to be released in March 2008. You can pre-order your copy at half price plus receive a free concert DVD by just clicking here.

John
Email John: johnsblog@teshmedia.com

The Etiquette of Movie-Going

Going to the movies used to be a relaxing experience. Not anymore. Now we have to enforce movie theatre etiquette so we can enjoy a film. Otherwise, we have to deal with the distraction of cell phones, text messages, loud off-screen discussions and crying babies.

One Australian journalist was brave enough to list the seven deadly sins of cinema etiquette:

1. Compulsive mobile phone use. I often ask myself, “What’s so important that a person can’t turn off his cell phone for 2 hours and watch a film?" Putting the phone on vibrate mode would be helpful.

If you must answer your cell during a film, here’s a polite way to pull that off. Assuming your phone is on vibrate, when a call comes in, press the talk button on your phone to stop the buzzing. Immediately quietly say to the caller, “One moment please.” Proceed to the exit and resume the conversation in the lobby.

Text messaging is not the answer since your phone glows a blue hue when a text comes in. Once you receive a text, you normally answer it and chances are there will be a few more distracting exchanges.

My suggestion is to leave your phone off and pick up your messages after the show.

2. Forgetting you’re not in the theatre lobby. Discussions about the film’s actors or the script don’t belong in the theatre during the show. You know there’s always someone next to you who has seen the film already giving a blow-by-blow account of what’s coming up.

There are also well meaning people who verbally offer advice to the actors in the drama, “No! Don’t touch that! You’ll blow up! . . . The killer’s behind the green door. Don’t open it!”

3. Engaging in loud non-movie chatter. If you need to talk about tonight’s dinner plans or last night’s date from hell, save this chatter for the commercials and trailers. Once the film starts, leave the discussion of non-movie issues outside.

4. Loudly opening a candy box and eating the contents. Opening candy boxes and soda cans is noisy. Whether you’re aware or not, loudly slurping the last remnants of your Pepsi is competition to a film’s musical soundtrack and dialogue. The munching of popcorn, the crinkling of the bag as it’s passed along the row and the opening of the fried chicken wrappers from the fast food you sneaked into the theatre are also highly distracting. We should do our best to do these things quietly . . . except for sneaking in the fast food.

5. Showing up late to a film. Once I’m in my seat, I’m ready to blast off. Occasionally a latecomer will ask me to move my seat so he can sit together with his date. That means I have to move further away from seeing the screen. There are other alternatives to walking in late: latecomers can sit in the dreaded front row; they can also see a later movie or they can be separated from their date for 120 minutes.

6. Kicking and knocking into other customers. Have you ever sat in front of someone who can’t shift his body in his seat without kicking the back of your chair? I usually go lurching forward when I’m rear-ended in a movie theatre. You have to kindly turn around the tell them to stop kicking the seat and hope they won’t stick gum in your hair as revenge.

7. Irresponsible parents. Children who walk into a theatre with their parents are the responsibility of those parents. A noisy baby or a bored child who becomes disruptive bothers everyone in the theater and the parents of the child should be aware of how their child’s behavior is affecting the audience. Until a child is old enough, it’s best to enjoy videos at home or hire a sitter when you want to enjoy a first-run feature.

Going to see a film should not be a time when you must be a movie cop. Let’s make our theatres a haven for people who love to go to the movies.

John
Email John: johnsblog@teshmedia.com

People have been writing to The Tesh Blog asking how to get my upcoming hardcover book Intelligence for Your Life:  Powerful Lessons for Personal Growth. It’s easy. You can pre-order my book at half price and you'll receive a free concert DVD by just clicking here.

Keep Your Eyes Fixed on the Prize

In today's excerpt from my new book Intelligence for Your Life: Powerful Lessons for Personal Growth, I discuss what quality we must master before we'll ever find personal fulfillment.  That essential trait is FOCUS!  I learned about focus from working with the most focused athletes in the world.

For about ten years of my life I worked as an announcer for CBS Sports and then NBC Sports.  One of the best things about announcing the Games and many World Championships is that I lived with these athletes and their teams for months at a time.

You would never get that kind of access to NBA or NFL players. And so I came to know them and their families and their passion for their sport. I’ve had dinner with French Tour de France champion Bernard Hinault at his home; I’ve skied with Austria’s Olympic downhill Champion Franz Klammer, and I’ve traveled all over Europe with gymnast Bart Conner and speedskater/cyclist Eric Heiden. Why am I namedropping? Because I want to give credibility to what I am about to share with you. Every one of these world-class athletes shares something that you and I can use to take us to greatness in everything we do: FOCUS.

Focus is a wonderful thing to watch. There are plenty of incredibly talented downhill racers in the world, just as there are thousands of brilliant kids graduating Ivy League schools every year. What distinguishes those who go on to become champions is the power of focus.

I will always have burned into my memory the image of Franz Klammer just before he stepped into the starting gate to win the Kitzbuehl downhill—helmet on, eyes closed, hands weaving in the air as he ran the course in his mind. Before the gate opened, you see the whole race in his face; you could watch the course come alive just by following his hands. Then his name blared forth from the speakers, and in moments he was out of the gate, attacking that same course—this time with his eyes open, at sixty-five miles an hour on a pair of skis.

Cyclists, gymnasts, divers. The great ones all prepare with the same routine. Greg Louganis had done the dive a thousand times, but he never lost the desire and discipline to stay focused. It’s why so many football quarterbacks are also straight-A students. It’s why many ex-athletes become successful announcers and businesswomen: They know the power of focus, and they practice it in everything they do. They never take their eyes off the prize.

In Intelligence for Your Life:  Powerful Lessons for Personal Growth, I've shared many practical ways you can get focused and stay fixed on your prize. You can pre-order my book today at half price and you'll receive a free concert DVD by just clicking here.

John
Email John: johnsblog@teshmedia.com

Caffeine: Your Kid's Drug of Choice

Early tomorrow morning cruise by any Starbucks located near a high school or middle school. What do you see? Kids! Kids drinking coffee!

Kids are into coffee at an earlier age more than ever before. The percentage of 18 to 24 year olds who drink coffee daily has doubled since 2003, from 16% to 21%, according to the National Coffee Association.

In the Montgomery Blair High School’s Online Newsletter, students posted their concerns with their fellow classmates’ use of caffeine:

•"Too many teenagers are addicted to caffeine. Young people today drink too much coffee and too much soda." -sophomore Tasha Prados

• "I know tons of people who stop by Starbucks in the morning to get their "fix" or else they complain the whole day about how they're tired.” -sophomore Jung Han

Let’s answer the major questions connected to the caffeine revolution among teens . . .

Why are kids suddenly hip to caffeine? Well, it’s everywhere . . . The stimulant is found not only in coffee, but also in tea, many soft drinks, chocolate, pain relievers and over-the-counter medications. Teens are also getting a serious caffeine fix from those energy drinks in the tall aluminum cans.

Some argue the reason for today’s teenage caffeine rage is that they’re chronically sleep deprived. 200 high school students took part in a 14-day study. They reported on the time they went to bed and woke up, any caffeine intake, and any naps they took. At the end of the study, the researchers found teens with higher caffeine intake slept fewer hours at night and took more naps during the day than those who had less caffeine. Hence, the need for more caffeine!

What are the downsides of caffeine? Let me give it to you straight. Caffeine causes anxiety, dizziness, headaches and the jitters. After all, caffeine is a stimulant that affects the central nervous system. Next time you’re stressed, remember that cup of java can make you more nervous.

Another downside is you end up needing more and more caffeine to get the jolt you’re looking for. When you have a large daily intake of caffeine, you develop less sensitivity to it and need more to get the same effects.

Caffeine can cause a person to lose calcium and that can lead to bone loss over a period of time. Doctors also warn caffeine can aggravate certain heart problems.

What’s a normal intake of caffeine? Experts in the American Dietetic Association consider 200-300 milligrams (mgs) of caffeine a day to be a moderate amount for adults. If you only consume 100 mgs a day, you’re still in danger of becoming dependent on caffeine. FYI: a 12-ounce cup of Starbucks coffee contains 260 mgs of caffeine.

For teens who need a fix of caffeine to get through classes or late night homework, they should limit their intake to 100 mgs of caffeine a day. Kids should consume a lot less.

To reduce your kid’s intake of caffeine try these steps:
•First, avoid caffeinated drinks in the evening. Instead, offer them water, milk or 100% fruit juice.
•Second, make plans to allow for plenty of time for homework, studying and writing reports. This will cut down on the desire to drink coffee.
•Third, help your teen plan how to get enough sleep. Some activities may need to be cut down to get into bed at a reasonable hour.
•Fourth, when your child gets tired and needs a lift, suggest they take a nap . . . not a Coke or a can of Red Bull.

John
Email John: johnsblog@teshmedia.com

Have your heard about my new hardcover book Intelligence For Your Life: Powerful Lessons for Personal Growth? You can pre-order it today at half price and you'll receive a free concert DVD by just clicking here.

You Are Designed To Serve!

Some of us are so focused on what we can do for others that we neglect our own needs. Others are so zeroed in on how others can meet their needs that theycare for no one but themselves. Is there a healthy balance between these two perspectives?

In today's excerpt from my upcoming hardcover book Intelligence For Your Life: Powerful Lessons for Personal Growth, you'll discover a new stability that will empower you to give to others while also finding lasting meaning for yourself.

I grew up in a household that was very performance-oriented. My dad was vice president of Hanes, my mom was a registered nurse. Our house was driven by report cards, piano recitals, Boy Scout merit badges and the pride of brand-new aluminum siding. My dad, John Sr., was a self-made man who commanded troops in Okinawa in World War II. He grew up on a farm, and with no college education he rose to the top and bought his family a home in prestigious Garden City on Long Island. Our success as a family and personally was measured in dollars and cents and wall plaques.

Then there was the other side of the family—our cousins from North Carolina who served in Liberia with the Peace Corps. I actually remember a few dinner conversations when they were referred to as the “hippies” of the family. I suspect that the unspoken opinion amongst our family was that they joined the Peace Corps because they couldn’t get a job. I carried that ridiculous mantra in my heart for most of my life.

But what I now recall is that Don, Joy, and Leslie Tesh were some of the happiest people I knew. They always had time to speak with me as a little kid. They seemed so relaxed and content. And they had amazing stories to tell about digging wells and creating gardens and building homes for people a world away who had none of these things. Up until then the only mission lesson I had received was at our dinner table, “Clean your plate . . . people in Africa are starving.”  The fact is that we were designed to serve. God planted in us a conscience and a desire to love others. But somewhere along the way the world grabs hold of us and our hearts grow selfish. Mine sure did. The aha moment for me did not come until someone handed me Rick Warren’s Purpose-Driven Life. This book is basically the rudder that began to steer my ship. It is, of course, rife with scripture but it also contains brilliant how-to chapters that spell it all out—just the way a guy needs it.

Soon I was reading every thing I could find on mission trips and service. Our researchers on the radio show found hundreds of studies on the power of serving others and its effect on blood pressure, longevity, and even business growth. We broadcast reports from respected learning institutions on how volunteerism helps people live longer and have stronger immune systems, fewer heart attacks, higher self-esteem, and a deeper sense of purpose in their lives. We also uncovered many studies showing that businesses with a culture of volunteerism grow faster, keep their employees longer, and form stronger relationships with their key business partners.

Do You Drink Water From A Sink or a Store?

Everyone has climbed on to the bottled water bandwagon. In capping off the year 2007 Newsweek reported Americans drank 8.2 billion gallons of bottled water, an increase of 9.5 % from the year before.

Despite the cleaner look of bottled water, studies show bottled water is not any safer than tap water. In fact, Benjamin Grumbles, head of the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency water programs, claims "It's an urban myth that bottled water is safer than tap water."

Though you might shudder to think of filling up your glass with tap water and chugging it down, consider this: Tap water might not be so bad after all. Why?

1. Tap water is tested daily. In compliance with the Safe Drinking Water Act, water suppliers are required by the EPA to test tap water daily. In comparison, the FDA tests bottled water on a weekly basis.

One LA Times article refers to the FDA testing big city tap water at least 100 times a month.

Over the years the FDA has adopted the EPA standards for tap water and applied them to bottled water. What a surprise! The standards for the amount of contaminants allowed in tap water and bottled water are the same.

If you’re wondering about your own tap water, click here to check on the quality of your state’s drinking water.

2. Tap water is less expensive. Bottled water costs 500 times more than tap water which costs less than a penny per glass compared to $7 a gallon for bottled water.

If you’re concerned that you’re spending too much on bottled water, try making an initial investment in a filtration system that purifies the water as it comes through the tap. According to one water filtration systems manufacturer, Brita, its high-end faucet system provides water for $0.18 a gallon, a considerable savings from $1 or more charged for an 8 to 12 ounce bottle of water!

3. Tap water is a tooth saver. There is more fluoride in tap water than in bottled water. Fluoride promotes strong teeth and prevents tooth decay. It is highly recommended that people who drink bottled water exclusively should inform their dentists of their water selection and take fluoride supplements.

4. Tap water doesn’t taste too bad. One spokesperson in the Minnesota Department of Health agrees that tap water may sometimes look or taste differently. Yet almost half of bottled water starts out as tap water.

The strange look of tap water does not mean it’s unsafe. Usually, the most dangerous contaminants are those that people cannot see, smell or taste. If you don’t like the taste of your tap water, run it through a Brita or Pur filter to remove most tastes and odors.

5. Tap water is better for our environment. According to Newsweek, the EPA released new data that shows manufacturing the 29 billion plastic bottles used for water in the United States requires the equivalent of more than 17 million barrels of crude oil.

A Yahoo article also brings out an often neglected fact: 60 million bottles a day are tossed into US landfills where they can take up to 1000 years to biodegrade. Bottled water may be healthy for your body but not for the environment.

So what’s your water of choice? Bottled water or stuff that drips out of your faucet? It’s your choice but at least now you can make an informed selection. Bottoms up!

John
Email John: johnsblog@teshmedia.com

Have your heard about my new hardcover book Intelligence For Your Life: Powerful Lessons for Personal Growth? The book is due out in early March but you can pre-order it today at half price and you'll receive a free concert DVD by just clicking here.

What It Takes To Be A Real Man

Macho is making a comeback among men . . . and the women love it! In today's excerpt from my book Intelligence For Your Life: Powerful Lessons for Personal Growth, I share one of my favorite experiences as a young boy . . . a time in my life that has had a profound impact on my understanding of masculinity.

For the last few decades, we men have had a hard time being men in this culture. We've been tamed, rendered harmless, our true passions squelched in favor of a sensitivity that, frankly, isn't always sincere. If men are going to pursue their passion, they're going to have to start by reclaiming their masculinity. Believe me, I know all about it.

I live with three females–my wife Connie, my daughter Prima, and Lucy the dog. I am surrounded by women. If I am not constantly vigilant I will end up sitting around the kitchen table talking about the color of drapes, or worse, sitting in a nail salon. Actually, it's always been that way for me; the women, women everywhere syndrome. I have two older sisters: Bonnie (eleven years older) and Mary Ellen (nine years older). When I was born, I think my mom must have just said, "Hey girls, just take care of him, will ya?"

And so as an "only" child with "three mothers," I found myself desperate for manly adventures. My dad recognized the danger here. He had been raised on a farm in rural North Carolina, and he realized that a young boy in the house with three women, growing up in the suburbs of Long Island, needed a regular dose of testosterone. So this city boy spent every summer in Rural Hall, NC, bunking with Grandma and Grandpa Tesh.

Since Percy Tesh (Grandpa) was not all that interested in the mechanics of kickball and little league, he proceeded to teach me the things he felt a "real man" needed to learn: How to pick corn; how to slop the hogs and hang and dry tobacco; how to pick off a watermelon-eating crow with a hip-shot from a 12-gauge; how to catch and clean a striped bass with a twenty-foot line and hula-popper lure. We woke with the morning sun. We hit the sack an hour after sundown. No TV. No telephone. We ate what we raised and only stopped working to drink from the well. We walked two miles to the country store for supplies and said our prayers at every meal. And once, when I sassed Grandma, Percy taught me how to cut the proper sized switch from the tree behind the barn, thus insuring that 'yes 'um' would be my future reply to any requests by Grandma.

Sure, I would have preferred spending my summers scarfing down Good Humors and hanging out at the Garden City Pool, but looking back on my experiences "down on the farm" I realize that I was living in a man's world, and that in those moments I was alive and purposeful.

You can read more about what I've learned about being a "real man" in my new hardcover book, Intelligence for Your Life: Powerful Lessons for Personal Growth. To pre-order the book, click here.

John
Email John: johnsblog@teshmedia.com

Too Much Stuff . . . Too Little Generosity

Our accumulation of stuff is getting way out of hand.   

According to an SRBI Public Affairs poll, in the 1950’s the average American woman had four pairs of shoes.  Today, it has stretched to thirteen pairs and still climbing.

Is the solution merely the need for more closet space?

Quite the opposite. In 1970 the average size home was 1,400 square feet. Today we’ve expanded our living space to 2,340 square feet, and we’re still running out of room for our stuff.

The desire to clean up is evident from the appearance of various businesses that claim to “help you get organized.” Container Store and California Closets are two such businesses. According to the International Herald Tribune, reality shows like "Mission Organization" on HGTV and "How Clean is Your House?" on Lifetime feed a national obsession to declutter.

The latest trend is to rent public storage space to sock away whatever does not fit into our homes.  One self-storage company alone-Public Storage-manages over 2,100 self-storage facilities with approximately 135 million rentable square feet!   That’s lots more room for a lot more stuff.

Where does it all end . . . and how?

Here are several steps to help you confront the entitlement attitude that says we need more stuff.

•Realize we all struggle with materialism. Surprisingly, materialism is not the accumulation of possessions. 
In fact, clutter and disorganization is not a house problem; it’s a person problem.

It’s our obsession with stuff, regardless of how little or how much we have, that is the problem. The opposite of obsession with things is contentment with what we have.

•Live your life like you’re always moving.   If you had to move would you take it all with you?  Do you really need two microwaves or boxes upon boxes of paperback books you’ve already read . . .  in college?  Can you be content with one hair dryer instead of three?

Once you’ve taken a survey of what you don’t need, then comes the test:  Sell some of your excess items on eBay or i-soldit.org and give the money to a charity that’s helping needy people with food, clothing and medical attention.

Another idea is to go on a 30 day fast from purchasing more clothes, books, electronics, furniture and expensive accessories.  Use the money you save and check out a website like JustGive.org where you can connect to more causes you care about.

•Put the two year rule into action.  If you have not used something for two years, chances are you will not use that item again. I’m talking about old iPods and cell phones; furniture stored away in the back of your garage or an old lawn mower collecting dust.

Most likely, you have clothing you’ve not worn.  It’s time to box them up and take them to the local Goodwill or Salvation Army.  Let other people make good use of the items sitting in your closet collecting dust.